I Am Not A Sports Fan

I'm not a big sports fan. I think it has something to do with my lack of coordination and talent when it comes to team sports. I run and train for races occasionally, but feel running is a mental discipline and doesn't require a lot of inbred talent. Ironically in undergrad I was a Health and Sport Sciences major. I chose this major because it was an open-ended major that allowed me to take all of my prerequisite classes for physical therapy with enough freedom for my many history courses.

The problem was that this particular major required that I take a team sport and an individual sport before I graduated. My junior year I decided that I needed to start with the individual sport. Since they didn't have running as one of the options I decided to take the beginner swimming class. My roommate thought it would be fun to join me and convinced me to take intermediate swimming, since I already "knew how to swim."

The first day of class we rolled out of bed and walked to the pool for our 7 am class. We changed into our swimsuits and waited for the TA. As we waited I got a good look at my fellow classmates. It was then that I knew that I didn't quite fit in. First, no one was in a cute black bathing suit with white polka dots; they all had speedos on. Second, everyone else had goggles and swim caps. I nor my roommate had neither. When the TA came in, blew his whistle, and told us to swim 5 warm up laps I knew that I had chosen the wrong class. Halfway through the first lap I informed my roommate that I was changing classes. I am not sure how I did it, but I stuck with the class the whole semester. Not only did I last the whole semester, but my roommate and I "practiced" swimming during our 2 off days so I would be less embarrassed in class. My triumph was when a hard core swim team girl complimented me on the last day of class, noting how much I had improved. I felt the toned arms and improved lung capacity were adequate rewards as well. (Note: I later found out that there is not an "advanced" class so all the former high school swim team people took intermediate. I also wore the black polka dot swim suit all semester, but I bought a swim cap and goggles.)

The next year I decided it was time to get the team sport over with. I picked softball because it was only an 8 week class. I would be finished by October and then could enjoy my nerdy history classes that I had enrolled in. I thought that maybe I could even learn some of the rules and learn how to hit a ball without flinching.

I was wrong.

I hated this class.

More than anyone can ever know.

Why?
First, the class was full of guys that felt they should be in major league baseball. I received a black eye from one such fellow who thought it would be fun to pitch me a fast ball. Second, the TA did not once mention rules or teach any of us even the basics. He just assumed that everyone knew everything they could about softball and baseball. So, we played baseball 2 days a week for 8 weeks. The TA was required to give a written final and thought this would be the best time to test our knowledge. The test was over every detail about softball, baseball, and other statistics that I had never heard of nor ever really wanted to know. This so incited my anger that I made a formal complaint to the Health and Sport Sciences department. Most of the girls in the class complained as well and the final graded test was not counted.

Now that you have some of my sports history it might not seem completely fair that I got to go to this game for free. Or then again, maybe it is justice in a world gone awry. Some people also might be offended that we left at half time, but I don't care. I went for the free food.