The Roller Coaster Begins

Three weeks ago I got onto a roller coaster and it hasn't stopped yet. I get the feeling it won't ever stop now that it was started though. I'll explain. It has been 3 weeks since I gave birth to my first born. A little sweet boy with bright trusting eyes. Right after the birth you are so happy that it is finally over and you are overwhelmed with joy to have that precious baby in your arms. You know about the pain, the sleep deprivation, but you don't care. Then you are put in a post maternity room. A fabulous night nurse helps you when the reality sets in at 10 in the evening. She walks you to the restroom, gives you lovely pain meds, and sets you up with wonderful, cool, life saving ice packs. They then roll you and check out how your body is doing. You get the diagnosis of hemorrhoids or no hemorrhoids and they explain how many stitches you have, how you tore etc. (Did I mention they give you pain meds before they do this?

The next day you have lots of visitors. Now these visitors are not only well wishers, but the hospital staff as well. People wake you up at 6 in the morning to take your blood, then the nurse with some of that great pain medication, then breakfast. (Now I understand why some people want to give birth at home and why some people abhor hospital food, but it sure is nice to have people bring you food and you don't have to get up and walk or make it!) After a few hours you realize that the hospital is NOT the place where one can rest, but did I mention they bring you food? (Oh, and there is all-you-can-eat jello and Popsicles as well...very tasty when in labor)

So I start the emotional roller coaster when we get home as well. Baby Boy turned out to have a great latch so my milk came in on the second day. I was surprised and so was he. I became engorged and he had trouble getting to the milk. He then had to go to the hospital because of jaundice where again I had great help. The lactation consultant was the kindest woman ever. She just let me cry and stayed with me and baby boy until he nursed. Then came the night of no sleep. I was instructed to pump every 2 hours. Now this translates into getting only 1 hour to 1 & 1/2 hours of sleep in between times because of a 30 minute time period of pumping. Finally we got home and baby boy has become an excellent nurser.

He still isn't on any particular schedule and the roller coaster continues. My hormones are following his schedule it seems. There are days when I feel so blessed and he is so adorable that I see a light at the end of the sleepless tunnel. Then there are days like today. I tried to get out to try on some clothes to help with the transition stage. Warning.... DO NOT DO THIS AFTER HAVING A BABY 3 WEEKS BEFORE. You will just feel awful about yourself and crawl back into your maternity shorts and tees and run home. So, the question of the day....Will life be normal again? Will one really be able to get out of the house without crying by the end? And finally..... Will I ever sleep again? These will be answered in the next year so stay tuned.